Love me no more

I never expect you to read my mind
but
you never wanted to listen to it...

I may be the one who make things bad..
but
you are the one who turn the circumstances even worst..

You never know me...
and
I can't barely feel your love...

If things don't improve,
I rather make my decision....
To stay here....

Do you listen to me?

Directions

I've been setting up my path before I step on it for years ago...I always hope my expectation will just go on smoothly, I put my faith into it....

I've been hoping for years, to wait for the right time, to start my real journey... But, when it is the time, I only realized that, I'm the only person who think it is right, who think this should be, who knows my way is going to disappear, entirely. It's been so hard for me to bring everything down and construct another way.... Yet, I only know I can't start all this by my own, just only me to start my own journey... This is awfully stupid when your own journey cannot be done by oneself, it's even worse when your thoughts are clarity that you're actually lack of ability to step on, and just like that...

I feel foolish, I feel helpless, I feel imma useless....

You have the path, but you will still need someone to bring you up....
It's not only myself to be with...
And, it's cut me down entirely to destroy the hopes that I build by myself.....


The disagreement should be done before I do....Unless I still hadn't build my first path.....
But, until I've completed, I only know I'm right here with only one person alone who can't do anything else.... Who stupidly waiting for the hopes.....

Heart bleeding

I'd already told you what I wish, what I want...You'd never tell all the story, just let me jump to the conclusion...Yet, put all the blame on me~

You said, don't ask you turn back once it has already passed by...So, I don't....
I'd trying to stop your temper, to be silent, to not say anything...

You blow my stack, yell on me...That's cutting my heart...
I would never never never let someone yell on me like that...
I seriously hate people simply piss my ass off with a shouting like this....

Be patience, I did...not to worse off anything with my silence...
I know you're stubborn, who never apologized first...
That's why I remain silent...
That's why I let you go...
Because I will never let you have the chance to yell on me again!

But this time,
your action is just to a fault...

you again,
disappointed me

Sorry

I know i was wrong...I messed up the thing...When I try to fix it up, it doesn't work because it was too late... I didn't apologize because I know there is no longer useful... I try to calm your emotion, but the words you spoke had cut my heart...
I dropped my tears silently, because I don't want to let you feel that I was annoying...

I know I'm imperfect for u, the marks had deducted...That's a huge mistakes that I ever did... My personality in your mind have been decreased seriously...Besides apologize, I don't know what to do instead...

I hate myself, hate the one who always mess thing up even when I know thing shouldn't be like that... I hate my tears, when I know tears don't mean anything...

I hope I can be somebody else, to have a big changes of myself..I rather become another person...To gain back the 50 marks...

I hope your knife can straightly cut off my heart, cut it deadly, so that I don't have any feel on it anymore....Yet, I'm dead to see and feel anything....

I've let you go...

Every time when I mention it, my tears wouldn't be in my control anymore...
I cried because the definition of friendship has been changed... Because disappointment came around when I read every one of your words...Because my heart had broken which actually nothing fault between us....

I've nothing much to say anymore or should say, I have nothing else to say at all... I flash back the moment we've been together for the 3 and a half years ago, I felt so secure to have you be my side...But now, things have been changed... I can't listen to your heart anymore, and you're blinded to look at me...

It just so disappointed...
And my heart had been cooled...

Friend is not for sharing, friend is part of our living purpose...Friend is to be appreciated...
That's my philosophy of true friend but now, it only turns into good friend...
I've always remember every words that you said to me...Never ever forget one word from yours... However, holding tight on this philosophy has no longer be needed anymore, I guess...

I shed my tears because I've let you go...

I need you but I know you don't need me anymore...

True Friend

I don't know what to say anymore for us... Sometimes, explanation has already blacken... I don't mean that but you think it is... Psychological...It's so funny... Thing has changed unexpectedly and suddenly...And I finally know, when a girl doesn't know anything about the fact, it's actually better... I used to posted whether a girl doesn't know the ugly truth, is that call lucky or stupid...
And still, I can't find the answer because everyone got their different point of view...

I might be too tough on handling my own philosophy but sometimes this is just what I heard and I just telling the truth that you should know, as you kept on asking me to say it now with the rejection on my face to face telling request... I told and yet, saying that I'm putting on fire which the thing is already exist before I know...

I burst my tears and think even more clearly the whole night... Time can heal everything but time cannot forgone what had been happened yesterday for our friendship...It was hurt...Truly hurt...I started to confused, I'd taken wrong definition on friendship... It's been too heavy for me to defined and now I know, it actually doesn't need that over concern...Even you concern about your friend, better act you don't know anything...Because, concern will unconditionally turn into an issue...

I came towards for you not the one you love...I felt so unworthy for you who ever do anything for your love one and finally get this kind of threaten...I never forget what you had told me in my room, your words that you speak it out to me, I've never taken it for granted... Never let the love one to influence us...And so, I only dare to talk to you as I firstly decided not to tell to avoid the case like before...But finally, it was wrong...

Girls ask me about you...Because people also treat you as their friend...They don't believe on something, and tell me... Maybe our concern is no longer be needed by you....Or you just don't love to hear it...I wonder if I didn't know all of this like other girls, I think it could be better...

"Your sincere concern sometimes becomes a fault and yet, you will be the stupid, who firstly from a good one turn into the bad one...And I decide, not to be the stupid one anymore..."

Maybe it's time for us to think on each other and even our own self if we're still being that understanding...My sincerity in this friendship is no longer been appreciated by you anymore since your trust on me has been declined..

Explanation has become a futile

Perhaps, friendship can be perpetuated